Feybie
yaReads Editor
Posts: 8266
Registered: 13-11-2008
Location: booksville
Member Is Offline
Mood: It's raining books!
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Empathy Underground
So some of you may have read the first chapter of my vampire novel in this section of the forum before, but I've re-worked it in the editing process
and the entire manuscript is now completed!
I'm in the process of shopping for an agent, which is exciting, but also pretty intense.
If you're interested, read it here:
http://nikkilea.com/empathy-underground-chapter-one-new-beginnings-...
If you ask me, the whole thing is much better than the last draft I posted here.
yareads.com
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strigoi
Beyond Help
Posts: 2586
Registered: 2-9-2009
Member Is Offline
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Ooh nice title. I think I've read the first chapter before when you posted it here, but I'm going to read it again. =)
“We must learn to reawaken ourselves and keep ourselves awake, not by mechanical aids, but by an infinite expectation of the dawn which does not
forsake us in our soundest sleep.” - Henry David Thoreau
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Feybie
yaReads Editor
Posts: 8266
Registered: 13-11-2008
Location: booksville
Member Is Offline
Mood: It's raining books!
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Well thanks!
yareads.com
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Anyta Sunday
Avid Reader
Posts: 15
Registered: 31-8-2011
Location: Pittsburgh, PA
Member Is Offline
Mood: Pretty darn happy, thank you.
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Hey Feybie,
Are you still writing this story?
I just joined the site today and am getting familiar with it. Anyway, I found this thread and clicked onto the chapter.
Now, I don't claim to be a professional in the writing biz (far from it, learning so much myself every day), but I do critique chapters (about 3-5 a
week), and I noticed a few things that I could point out (only constructive criticism) should you be interested?
Please reply if you are--also, if you happen to have a more current version of chapter one, I'd be happy to look at that one, just sent the link.
Anyway, I offer because I've read and really enjoyed your reviews, so this could be a little something I could do to say thanks. Again, only from a
wannabe author too, lol!
P.S. Love the rainbow socks.
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nissie
Little Dhampir
Posts: 4728
Registered: 3-6-2009
Location: Mexico
Member Is Offline
Mood: Rose is in red. But never in blue, sharp as a thron. Fights like one too.
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I read it last year and I loved it!
We miss you Nikki
You, Yes, You, linger inside my heart Y
think I may cheat on Marcus Flutie... dang you Seth Mortensen!
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edele1
Avid Reader
Posts: 3
Registered: 29-9-2011
Member Is Offline
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Great intro to bring the reader in! Nice work 
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